Saturday, May 10, 2008

Mother’s Day 2008

Happy Mother's Day!

Even though this day was originally a call to leave war behind (http://www.prism.net/user/fcarpenter/howe.html) I kind of think Mother's Day is a call to remember just what this whole dishes-laundry-carpool carousel we ride is all about.

Even before I had any babies, I knew that raising kids was an art, that creating a home that would be a nest to grow a family would be the biggest thing that any person could ever do, and that I; with the biology and sprit I'm equipped with as a woman, would be perfectly suited to do just that.

I'm not talking Martha Stewart perfection of obsession with the bric-brac that sometimes comes with a house. Really what I mean is that funny ju-ju you feel when you come into a home. Maybe it's the sizzle of onions and veggies that will make a long simmered soup, or maybe it's the fabric softener that goes into the washer on the rinse cycle. Maybe it's the homebaked cookies that poor Hillary Clinton will never live down. But really, I think it's the air that invites a long conversation. It's the cozy, sometimes cluttered couch that invites sitting together for some down time. It's the feeling of acceptance and time and love and hope and care that comes when someone who lives in the house has chosen, as their primary function in life, to create a home for a family.

It's nothing for a delicate soul. There are no raises. The benefits are that eventually someone might take out the garbage FOR you and maybe they'll find your commitment to them lovely. But there will be days that they wish for nothing more than for you go just get out of their way and leave them alone.

Full time employment looks pretty good when this happens.

Someone else can run that afternoon with snacks and homework and the ride home from school.

Someone else can make dinner.

Someone else can get the kids to get on the bus to just go to school, even if homework isn't all done just right.

But those drives have little moments of clear brillance that you'll miss. And those dinner prep moments have chemistry lessons and LIFE lessons that you'll miss. And if you leave for those tricky times, you can't help but MISS things. There's no way to capture all of it, unless you are just there. No other way.

I've worked full time while homeschooling three kids. It's not easy, it's not fun. But if it was what I had to do to make the days work, well then, that was the only choice. I am not willing to miss those days.

Quality time is a lie. Time is time, and it doesn't matter if you're gone for an excellent reason. You are still, to you own child, just gone.

Maybe lots of moms disagree and feel that they'll lose themselves if they are JUST home with kids (http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/362567_optin10.html).

For me, there is no greater art, nothing more important, no better way to spend my life, than with my amazing sons, doing the laundry, the dishes, driving to practice. There is nothing I'd trade for the chance, the honor, of being their mother. Nothing.

Happy Mother's Day.

Kari Kopnick

Kari Kopnick shares her afternoon at the District 47 Democrat Caucus:

Oh man what a fantastic day! It was a good day to be a Washingtonian. It was a good day to be a Citizen. It was a good day to be here in these United States where we have so many ideals and so far to go to meet them.

I went to my neighborhood caucus Saturday afternoon. I had to park way across a busy street in a grocery store parking lot and trek over to the school where my neighbors were packed tight into a school gym.

Crammed in the stuffy little gym were old people, young people and middle aged people, people of lots of ethnic and racial groups and people of different physical abilities. From the looks of the cars in the parking lot there were even probably richer and less rich folks. It was very cool. We were all there doing the whole little "d" democracy thing.

And everyone was so respectful. People were streaming in the doors at least until 1:30, and since my precinct was located by the entrance, I got to see neighbors help their neighbors find the right precinct, navigate wheelchairs and walkers thru the crowd and keep the room not too hot and not too cold; all with kindness and respect.

I think every time an older person came in a chair was immediately offered to them.

And when it came time to divide up for our respective candidates, everyone was very careful to walk that line of respect for each other's choice.

Is this what politics are always like?

OK, stop laughing.

At least for one day the politics were clean and high minded. It was a good day to be a Benson Hill neighbor.

Kari attended the Barack Obama rally at Key Arena yesterday. Here are some of her photos. ( Read more... )

Last week I made a few calls to find out more about our upcoming census in the Benson Hill neighborhood. Here’s the latest:

So Saturday afternoon there was a knock at my front door. No one ever just stops by anymore, well unless they think we're having a yard sale because our front yard is kinda cluttered if we're say, oh, cleaning out the garage, or just looking hard for something we might have stored in our garage. But our yard was clear and I was the only one home. I figured there was a real reason for this knock.

Sure enough there was my friendly neighborhood census enumerator, wearing her City of Renton badge and kindly asking me if I would be willing to take the annexation census survey. The poor, poor woman! I was headed out to a church meeting, so I was dressed like a normal person, but when I opened my mouth she clearly thought I must be extremely strange.

It's just a census survey. It's just our names.

Yep, but I'm still all worried by it.

Today I was talking with my favorite punk-rock-girl-scout teenager about the annexation census. She was of two minds, just like me. (see? I knew I liked this girl) She said that maybe it's the "stand-up-guy" kind of thing to do, if you’re going to use the fire department and the street sweepers and all the good city services, maybe you owe it to the city to tell them your names and be counted. But she also thought that maybe just opting out wasn't the worst thing either. Her green hair distracted me a little, did she dye it green because she's a girl scout? Probably not. But I agree, with both her points.

So, this week I'll probably send in my census survey on line so that nice woman doesn't have to come and knock on my door again. I'll be the stand up guy.

And maybe I'll even dye my hair green! OK, not. But it would take my mind off this census!

That's my news from Benson Hills for this week.

Kari Kopnick

In this entry, Benson Hill resident Kari Kopnick ponders the Renton Census that is required to get state assistance with annexation funding. Here is her journal entry:
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This is the information age, I know it. I am well past my 20s but I still have a facebook and a myspace. I play scrabble online with friends across the country, and keep in touch with my mom by email.

But I’m still a little skittish about giving out information about my family. Part of the Benson Hill neighborhood annexation to Renton involves a census. I got a letter a couple of weeks ago from the city advising us that a “census enumerator” will be coming to the door, wearing an official City of Renton badge with their name and picture on it. They have been charged to ask me my name, and the name of everyone who lives in my household. It’s for money, so the city can get funds allocated based on population increase. I get it. But still, I was a little uneasy when I heard about this.

OK, so what’s the big deal? I have a pretty public life. I work for a church and my contact information is all over the church website. I have a facebook with lots of information; even my political leanings. I know that technically that information is private, but I really I think if someone wanted it, they could get it.

Maybe that’s it. I wonder if the census information will really be destroyed after the verification process. I momentarily remember that during World War 2 when people of Japanese decent were held in concentration camps, one way that officials located the people was with US census information. And we are a mixed race family. My husband is a Korean American, I’m white, and our kids are like Barak Obama, Tiger Woods and Keanu Reeve—mixed race or what some mixed race Asian folks call hapa.

But this form doesn’t ask for race.

This census form (available online at rentonwa.gov) only asks for our names and a kind of survey of how much time we spend at our home address. “Do any of those listed above attend school and not live at the above address during the school year?” “Do any of those listed above sleep elsewhere more than three nights per week?” things like that.

Maybe my issue is with listing my kids. Maybe naming the people over 18 who live here is not a big deal, but writing down the names of the kids is unsettling.

But my kids’ names are on forms we send to the IRS and they are registered for school. It’s not like they’re flying under the radar right now.

So, I thought I should be a good citizen and do what the letter I got says to do if I have questions or concerns and call the person they list to call. I easily reached Glenn MacGilva, the person listed. He even answered on the first ring. And he was really friendly. Glenn is from the firm called Census Services that Renton hired to do the census of our area. He seemed maybe to be expecting that I was about to bite his head off, but I wasn’t. I really just wanted to know why the city needed our names. And I wanted to know what was going to happen once I gave our names over to his “enumerator”, the person that knocks on my door.

He told me that the state wants names so that they can be assured that the city is not just making up names to pad the numbers being annexed, which of course equals more money, and also to bar against inadvertent duplicates. When I asked why they can’t just do an average, you know say this many households usually have this many people so here’s the number. He told me that that would average out over a really big number of households, but given that we’re really dealing with neighborhoods, it can be very different; like a neighborhood with lots of empty nesters probably has a different average household number than a neighborhood with lots of families with young kids. Mr. MacGilva also told me that the state actually goes and does random checks with a name match, and that’s why it can’t really just be a number. That’s why they want a name.

OK. That I’ll buy. I can see the point there.

Mr. MacGilva told me if I had concerns about security of the confidentiality of my family’s names once they left my front door I should call a woman named Theresa Lowe from the State Office of Financial Management. So I did.

Ms. Lowe was also lovely to talk with, and even remembered in 1967 being at the Federal Office building preparing for the 1970 survey and hearing from people who had been profiled during World War 2 based on the US Census. Now that’s living history. She reassured me that with these annexation surveys the names are physically cut from the forms and shredded when they reach her office. And she also affirmed that there is no law that compels us to answer this census. It is important to get the best response to the census possible, so the state can provide the right level of funding. But it’s still voluntary.

So now, I don’t know!

Maybe I should just go live in a yurt on an island in the ocean where no one cares who lives there.

Yeah, I know. There would probably be a motor powered canoe that would putter up and someone would climb out, and they’d have a name badge and a clip board. And they’d want to know who lived in my yurt and how many nights a week we all slept there.

Yep, it's the information age.

Kari Kopnick

So I just spent a few days back in the cold tundra that I used to call home. Before I made my home on Benson Hill here in Renton, I lived in Minnesota.

Minnesota is full of people who are a lot like Washingtonians. There are more Scandinavians back in the Midwest; less density of people in neighborhoods and less traffic and it's really, really cold in the winter, but in both states the folks are nice.

I grew up in Bloomington, Minnesota in the shadow of the Mall of America. Well, where the MOA is now—back then it was an old baseball and football stadium—an outdoor one if you can imagine that. But now it's a place where tourists flock to shop. And I really do think you can buy anything that you could possibly need there and a whole lot of things you would never, ever need.

This trip back I noticed that Bloomington is actually a lot like Renton. It's an inner ring suburb, meaning it was one of the first places people fled the cost and crowding of the city for their own little home. It's big, covering a huge amount of area. And Bloomington has a real industrial base just like Renton.

In both towns you go from the neighborhood that has new condos and quad homes to the old "war boxes" in a block or two. You have a nice downtown, although ours here in Renton is better, and we are getting some really decent shopping with the Landing—not a mall with an amusement park in the middle, but it has what we need.

When I was growing up a thousand years ago, Bloomington was the third largest city in Minnesota. As of January 1st Rochester, MN is the third largest.

Rochester feels like a smallish city. My family and I spent New Years Eve visiting old friends in Rochester.

click on image to enlarge






Well, we weren't really visiting friends. We were visiting our Cheezeball family, they may not be related officially, but we bonded early on trying to catch those little crunchy "food product snacks" after a friend threw them for us. That was 20 years ago. We’ve been there for each other ever since, so it's better than family. A whole passel of us made the trek to Rochester to celebrate the New Year and all our new beginnings.

The folks we know in Rochester moved to Southeast Minnesota for a job at the Mayo Clinic and are still there 10 years later.

Getting to Rochester from Bloomington is like driving to Olympia for us, except instead of driving thru what feels like one continuing city; you pass a million farmsteads, some of them still clearly producing crops during the 5 month growing season. And the terrain is flat like the ocean. Flat, flat, flat.

On New Year's Eve, the Rochester town paper had a feature about how the City of Rochester was annexing some neighborhoods so they could provide services for the people there. Sound familiar?

The Rochester City Council has been talking about annexation since the 90s. And it was all voluntary. Not everyone is happy about it of course. That's how things go. Some folks think things were just fine as is. But like here in Renton, the services were really needed. People needed one place to call to get their city related issues handled.

And like it will be here in Renton, things are changing.

Like building the Mall of America right where Minnesota Twins Star Harmon Killebrew hit homeruns.


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And like the super fancy boutique stores going in where there used to be five and dimes.

And even like having a Starbucks just about everywhere you can want one in my hometown now; including Target. I'm not complaining. I'm just noticing

The times, they are a changin'.

Now I have to go listen to some Bob Dylan.

Happy New Year!

Kari Kopnick

It's been a long week. Somehow, I'm not sure how this happened exactly, but somehow, it's almost Christmas. Again. And somehow, again, I'm not done with my Christmas shopping. For anyone. Even the dog.

So my dear husband and I decided to take a break from the shopping and budget and deciphering of our sons' Christmas lists and go out for a quick pint of beer here in our local town. Now, Downtown Renton has a lot of great little spots to grab a quick pint. I love The Whistle Stop and always try to lure anyone who wants to meet for a lunch meeting to come and split sweet potato fries with me there.

The Dog and Pony is great, with a fantastic list of local beers that is always changing. And Giant's Causeway is a treat, especially if you catch the live music.

But if you're out looking for a place to grab a quick date on a Sunday night, those aren’t even an option. All closed. It's quiet on Sunday nights here in our town, the Piazza is all lit up, the transit center looks active. But there aren't a lot of our eateries and pubs open.

So my husband and I wound up in one of the hang outs in town we like best: La Hacienda. Once last fall we even stopped in to celebrate our friend's new tattoo from Diamond Lil's. It was full blast-- fun, great service and fantastic food. So we hit La Hacienda at, oh about 8 on Sunday night.



The place was pretty empty, just a few folks hanging out at the bar and a few couples eating and chatting, good music on the jukebox, and a nice waiter. Gustavo took our whining for a dark beer seriously and told us about Negro Modelo, a Mexican beer which turned out to be good—smooth and not too heavy but with a good bite to it. We even split a second one. I think Gustavo was just showing off but he brought us new chilled glasses and I swear to the Christmas elves he split the bottle of beer perfectly between the glasses, must have been down to the drop. He kept us stocked up on the amazing pico de gallo and salsa, and brought our check fast so we could get home and back to stressing out about our how soon Christmas is coming.


Suppose once we get annexed we'll have nice spots to eat over on Benson Hill? I mean, I love the new Pho World by Fred Meyer, but it's just not the same as heading to a downtown. Even our little downtown. I love it. Hey, maybe I should head there during the day well, you know, for some Christmas shopping. Maybe someone will even meet me for some of those sweet potato fries when I'm done!

Kari Kopnick
(see Kari's other entries by clicking the tag below)

(Kari Kopnick is doing a series of articles about life on Benson Hill, and how things are changing with annexation to Renton)

I was thinking about laundry on a trip through my neighborhood the other day. I mean, laundry, boring, drudgery, right? Yep. I mean, OK, it’s not like my great grandmother’s day when you really had to DO the laundry with a fire to heat the water, and the lye soap you made yourself, and the scrubbing done by hand. That’s true. But it’s still a pain. My laundry room isn’t one of those cute ones like you’d see on the TV network. It’s a dark little space with, well, lots of laundry in it!

Over the years of raising kids I’ve had different systems to get our clothes from yucky and dirty to clean and organized. There was a period of denial that there even was laundry. That led to monstrous piles of laundry—I used to even joke we’d become a new religion that involved worshipping the laundry gods and those piles were our offerings.

Well, then when the babies were a little older and I could breathe every other day I decided to do laundry once a week. Wednesday was laundry day. I had to go out and buy more socks and underwear for everyone, and by Tuesday we all were dressed a little oddly, but it worked.

Then when I worked the swing shift for a few years my husband came up with the ultimate system for laundry. He’s an engineer, and I’d highly recommend an engineering degree for anyone planning to run a house; either that or a brain that works like his.

This is what he did: the laundry gets washed and dried all day. Our laundry room is off the kitchen so you always know when the washer and dryer aren’t running because it’s quiet. So in the morning you can get thru two loads. Add one before dinner and one after and even my soccer-playing-dirt-collecting family gets through it all. Then, here’s the brilliance: everyone takes a laundry basket of clean clothes to the biggest bed in the house. You dump it all in the middle of the bed and then sort it as fast as you can—by throwing every sock and shirt and every last thing at the person it belongs to. I have three boys, so it works great. Well, unless one of them lays down in the middle of the bed, then the other kids just pile laundry on top of them!

So this system has worked for a couple of years, but now everyone is busy with, teams, clubs, plays and friends. All that fun is taking up our evenings. So heading through my neighborhood I came up with a new idea. These brilliant folks, neighbors of mine, have their washer and dryer OUTSIDE! Right in the yard! Hey, maybe they even use rainwater, and wind power to run them. I can get behind this. I’d take a nice nature walk, pass through some bushes and trees, walk along next to the other appliances (not sure why they’re out there yet…..I’ll let you know if I figure that one out). And then with June Cleaver-like pep, I could cheerfully wash my family’s clothes. I would be almost like my ancestor women. It would combine fresh air, exercise and clean clothes. Perfect.



But wait? What about when we really, legally, officially become a part of Renton over here on Benson Hill? I wonder what our new city is going to say about a washer and dryer (and freezer and stove) outside in the front yard?

Hmmm, I’ll have to think on this one.

Kari Kopnick, above right, is part of the 17,000-person Benson Hill annexation area. Kari has agreed to document her experiences in transitioning from life in King County to life in Renton. I promise you will enjoy her writing style. This is her first installment.

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Here it is December. Finally. For me November was one of those months where you put your head down and charge through everything without even looking up. Whew, so glad that’s over. So, here it is, December, I have a little time to breathe again, and hey, today there was a beautiful snow fall! What a great time to go for a walk in my neighborhood. I hadn’t been for a nice walk in a month.

I headed out the door. The snow was falling, my kids had been out in the snow and had a great time. It was my turn. As I walked up the hill by my house it was almost twilight and the some of the neighbors had holiday lights on their houses that were starting to turn on as I walked past. It was so pretty! As I walked my thoughts wandered to what happened in the month I worked straight through.

“Hey! I know one really big thing!” I thought as I walked past the neighbors with a 20 foot tree decorated just like the tree Charlie Brown chose. “We’re really part of Renton, now!” That’s right, the most intense local election I’ve ever followed happened in November and now my Benson Hill neighborhood is really a part of the City of Renton.

So, I wondered, what does that really mean? I mean, yes our schools don’t change and our water services are still provided by the same folks. When we call the police they’ll come faster that the sheriff could, that’s great. And our taxes will go up a couple of lattes worth every year, sounds worth it. Come on though, what does it REALLY mean!?

I know; cheaper admission to Henry Moses Pool on those super hot days in the summer. OK, that’s good, that’s really good. But what else? Well, at Renton River Days we get to stand proud as real City of Renton residents. No more cousins from unincorporated King County! And our streets will be maintained, our zoning enforced, and what used to be a struggle to figure out who to call (stray dog? King County or Renton?) is no longer a question. We’re part of Renton. We’re Rentonites.

I like that. Rentonites. Very cool.

And the walk was excellent.







(above) Two of Kari's sons enjoy the December 1st snowfall

I've been in touch with a few excellent writers and a couple additional photographers to help me add frequent interesting content to this website.

I'm very pleased that starting in December, Kari Kopnick will begin documenting and sharing her first-hand experiences and observations as her King County neighborhood transitions into the city of Renton. Kari and I expect this process to be interesting for many months, given the size of the annexation and all the new employees that will be added. Kari is prepared to keep us informed until the dust settles. Right now she is working on some other writing assignments, so she won't be able to begin for a couple of weeks.





Kari Kopnick